Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Rest in Peace, my little friend...






I have not laid ink to paper in about week. This in and of itself makes me very sad. But the reason I have been away from my work table is heartbreaking. You see, last Wednesday evening, my little old man kitty, Hunter, had a nosebleed. At first, I thought he had scratched his nose against something sharp, so I looked him over very carefully, much to his dismay. I could not find a scratch, but it did not appear that the blood was coming from the inside of his nose. There was not a lot of blood, so it was easy to dismiss it as a result of kitty mischief. He was in good spirits and went on about his normal feline antics. The next night, he had another nosebleed. Now I was greatly concerned.

A trip to the vet the next morning turned all my fears into a reality. An x-ray showed that Hunter had a tumor the size of the tip of my thumb in his nasal passage. Anyone with cats knows that their nasal passages are not very big, so this was very serious. Surgery was not an option and radiation on a 19 year old cat is usually not successful, so we brought Hunter home, made him comfortable, loved on him, and waited. It was the longest 4 days of my life and felt like an eternity. He had a reasonably good weekend, all things considered. Monday was a very good day, as he still had energy to jump into my lap for a love-fest, and nuzzle my hand for pets and scratches. His little nose continued to bleed off and on, but he did not seem to be in any pain. Tuesday afternoon, things changed for the worse. He was not responsive when I spoke his name. A scratch on the head elicited no response. It was his way of telling me, it was time. He was tired and ready to move on. My sister made the sad trek to the vet with me this morning and he laid in my lap while Dr. Walker took him on the next steps of his journey. It felt as if my sister and I would flood that little room with our sobs and our tears.

Today my heart is broken into a million tiny pieces. Hunter gave me so much joy during his life and I am very lucky that he chose me to share his years with. You see, 18 years ago I had gone to the animal shelter in search of my siamese kitty who had disappeared. I was distraught over losing her. As I walked through the cages of adoptables, a furry paw reached out of one of the cages and touched my shoulder. It was Hunter. I had not gone into the shelter that day planning on taking anyone home except for Chelsea, if she happened to be there; however, one look into those big gold/green eyes and I had to hold him. When I picked him up, he clung to me like a child and I knew I could not leave him there. We had somehow connected in just that instance. The tag on his cage estimated his age was between 1-3 years old. From that day forward, he filled my days with his lively personality, his obviously regal good looks, and knowing glances that silently said "silly human, what are you up to now"? Hunter gave me 18 years of heartfelt joy and unconditional love, and I cannot ask for more than that.

In closing, let me share with you a Hopi prayer that I happen to have on a rubber stamp, that makes me think of my feline friend:

Do not stand
by my grave and weep.
I am not there.
I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints
of snow.
I am the sunlight
on ripened grain.
I am the gentle Autumn's rain.

When you awaken
in the morning hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet
birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars
that shine in the night.
Do not stand
by my grave and weep.
I am not there.
I do not sleep.

Rest in peace, my little friend. I will keep you in my heart forever.

15 comments:

  1. Aww, sweetie, I'm so sorry. I got goosebumps reading that post; wish I was able to give you a real hug instead of just a cyber one!

    At least he didn't seem to be in pain.

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  2. cheryl i am so sorry to hear about hunter. i know how sad you are and my heart just goes out to you. it sounds like you had a wonderful life together ( i love how he picked you out at the shelter. our cash did the same with us ) and i know you will miss him. hugs from me and our two little ones, cash and patches....

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  3. Oh Cheryl I'm so sorry to hear about your beautiful Hunter. I can imagine how sad you must feel with the pain of missing him. Comfort yourself with the knowledge that you gave him a good life and he loved you

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  4. Sending you big hugs and condolences, Cheryl! Losing Hunter was like losing a teenage child--19 years is a good, long life. I'm so happy that he was chosen by you to live with and grow old with. Thanks for sharing photos of such a handsome cat! Take care, Cheryl!

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  5. im so sorry cheryl to hear your sad news, im sitting at my computer now with tears in my eyes. He had a long happy life with you and was well loved. My little baby 'charity' came to me when i went to my local shelter she was about 3 years old and pregnant, they found her in a box taped up :( and it was love at first sight, ive had her 4 years now i can only hope i get another 14 like you and hunter did. he was a handsome chap and he will be missed dearly, all my love to you xxx

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  6. I'm so sorry, Cheryl...sending lots of warm light and hugs your way!

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  7. I will miss Hunter and his funny antics so much! He was a wonderful kitty and ruled the Manor so well, for so many years! What a sweetheart he was, we all loved him, and he knew he was loved. I wish I was there to give you a big hug!
    Love Ya, Mom

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  8. Oh, Cheryl. I am so sorry for your loss. Your post was so eloquent that I felt like I was there with you and am so sad I can't give you a comforting hug.

    I am so glad you had so many wonderful years together. It sounds like you gave him a wonderful life and he did the same for you.

    Wish there was a way to ease your pain. ((((HUGS))))

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  9. Cheryl, I am so sorry for your loss. Hunter sounds like he was the perfect companion. Your tribute to your furry love was very touching, I loved reading how you 2 met. I'm praying your broken heart will mend and your memories of Hunter will become treasures.
    blessings to you,
    nancy

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  10. I'm sorry, Cheryl, for your loss !
    Friendly hugs from Paris

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  11. Awwww. He was a gorgeous cat. You're right. He was downright regal looking.

    Thanks for sharing the story of his adoption. He obviously wanted you as his person. I'm so glad you had 18 years together.

    {{((hugs))}}

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  12. Oh no . . . I'm so sorry Cheryl.

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  13. {{{Cheryl}}}, I am so sorry. I shed a few tears reading your story. We went through the same thing several years ago, except our Reagan was only about 6 months old. Just know that Hunter will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge and you'll be together again.

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  14. Wow, Cheryl, you're making me cry because I can totally understand! We ADORE our pets, they are part of the family. We've lost three over the years that we still miss to this day and always will. And we can't bear to think of the day when we'll lose another. My cat Jazzy is my buddy, too... she follows me everywhere, loves me without question. We almost lost her when she swallowed a ribbon that got tangled up in her intestines, but fortunately the vet was able to save her and she's still relatively young. I've told her that's it, I can't afford the rest of her 8 lives! But truth is, you'd do almost anything for your fur babies, and losing them is just the hardest thing. I recommend getting another cat right away. There's just nothing better than a good pet, even when it means we eventually have to say goodbye.

    Hugs,
    Lisa

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Thank you for your lovely comments! They are greatly appreciated :D